Sunday, September 25, 2011

Close To The Edge


"That does look a little better--you can't
see my rosacea-- but I still have a double chin.  I guess I'll just
have to get used to being ugly for the rest of my life.  I certainly
am not going to get better looking as I age :("

A friend emailed me a picture that they wanted me to "fix" in Photoshop.  Which read as; make me look thinner, make my face less red, get rid of my double chin.  I changed the photo to black and white and sent it back.  

I can understand wanting to look "better" in pictures but the only way to fix everything is through hard work and determination.  Photoshop is not a cure all.  This is a woman that I got to join Weight Watchers shortly after I did and I really thought she would stick with it, I tried really hard to be her cheerleader.  Well it didn't work.  She quit shortly after and now 6 months later she is trying a different diet.  

I truly believe she has more going on than just the weight, I mean I know she does.  I think there is some high level depression going on also.  I wish I could help her but I know I can't.  At this point this friend could become a drain on me and I have to throw up my hands and move on or it is likely I could be dragged down also.

She never has anything good to say about herself or her life.  And I am not exaggerating when I say that.  I can understand that she is in a really shitty time of her life.  However at some point you need to ask for help or become your own cheerleader.

It is a hard choice to "wash my hands" of that type of situation or person but I can't help everyone and I can't get off track.  I don't have the time or energy to concentrate on someone who is not ready to make a change and seek professional help.

Re-reading that last sentence makes me sound like a bitch but there isn't a better way to say it.  I am determined to make this work for me and I also have a lot of things going on right now.  It is so easy to get caught up in someone else's life and drama because then you don't have to think about your own problems, but it is not worth it.  Your problems will still be there waiting for you but you won't have the energy to fix them because you will have spent it all emotionally on someone else.

Do what you can to help others.  Recognize the point when you can no longer help.  Wish them luck.  Move on.

Until next time,
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